The Great Depression…
I think depression is a complicated matter, the source of which varies from individual to individual. It can come from physical, emotional and spiritual sources. I will discuss each in turn from my personal experiences. What happens when you take a load of vitamins, mineral and herbal supplements, complete liver flishes and enemas but the depression is still there?
Is Depression Physical?
Children are indeed like little sponges, soaking up nearly everything they hear, see and experience during these formative years. Unfortunately, if children are raised in a stressful environment, the emotional trauma can cause physical changes that impacts them for the rest of their lives. The vast majority have medical problems related to previous emotional stress. And for the terious illnesses, most of the time, the trauma can go all the way back to their childhood. What is very consistent though is that nearly everyone, including myself at first, are indenial that their previous emotional wounding could have any influence at all on their current physical health. Individuals who previously addressed that with therapists or with a prayer can cure depression this way but more needs to be deciphered.
A Stressful Childhood Can Begin in the Womb…
Additionally, it is important to understand this process actually starts even before you are born, while you’re still in the womb. The evidence is very clear, for instance, that infants whose mother’s were depressed while pregnant are more likely to be irritable and sleep erratically, show diminished responsiveness and may develop problem behaviors during their early school years.I also believe that there is a link to the father's stresses and these frequently are transferred to the child as well. Whether the stress occurs in utero or after, during a child’s infant years, is irrelevant. Either way it can lead to a vicious cycle of repetition that can go on for many generations. As this new study showed, children who grew up in stressful homes had weakened immune systems. This was true even of children who spent time in an orphanage, then were later raised in a loving environment.
I've been confronted with some strong truths lately. I believe that a lack of love for the self, self esteem, self image and a devaluation of the self directly effects our immune system and our bodies relationship with everything we give to it. Our bodies relationship with the food we give it is directly related to our minds relationship with our body and ourselves in general.
I realise that I have avoided intimate relationships for a long time due to a lack of love for myself and my body. Unfortunately, if emotional challenges are not dealt with, the physical impact of stress can colour your entire life. Think of a dog that is abused or neglected as a puppy. This trauma wires that dog’s brain to be fearful, anxious and stressed for the rest of its life similar to Bowlby's theory. Researchers believe, and I tend to agree, that the same is true of people, particularly if nothing is done to address it. One particularly telling study by researchers from the McLean Hospital in Belmont, Massachusetts found that childhood trauma actually causes permanent physical changes to developing brains. As adults, those who had been abused and neglected as children were:
• More likely to experience epileptic seizures caused by changes to the limbic system, a part of the brain that controls emotions.
• Twice as likely as non-abused children to have an abnormal electroencephalogram (EEG), a reading that measures electrical activity of the brain. These abnormal EEGs were associated with increased self-destructive behavior and aggression.
• Deficient in development of the left side of their brain, which may lead to depression and problems with memory.
• Not able to fully integrate function of the left and right sides of their brain as well as those who had not been abused, possibly due to a decrease in the size of the bridge between the two hemispheres of the brain.
Interestingly, neuroimaging studies have found that meditation training tends to decrease activation of the amygdala, the structure at the base of the brain known to have a role in processing memory and emotion which is shaped like an almond. However, such changes were only seen among study participants who were actively meditating or in a state of stillness .The current study, though, aimed to test the hypothesis that meditation training could also produce a generalised reduction in amygdala response to emotional stimuli, which can be measured by functional MRI - magnetic resonance imaging. Participants previously enrolled in a larger study into the effects of two forms of meditation, based at Emory University in Atlanta. Healthy adults with no experience in meditating participated in an eight-week courses in either mindful attention meditation - the most commonly studied form that focuses on developing attention and awareness of breathing, thoughts and emotions, a less-studied form that includes methods designed to develop loving, kindness and compassion for oneself and for others," Science Daily reported. A control group, meanwhile, took part in an eight-week course about health education. Within three weeks of beginning the training and three weeks after completing it, 12 participants from each of the three groups traveled to Boston for fMCI imaging at a state-of-the-art facility. Brain scans were performed as the volunteers were shown a series of 216 different images, or 108 per session, of people in situations that depicted positive, negative or neutral emotional content. The concept of meditation was not mentioned to participants during pre-imaging instructions. Afterward, researchers confirmed that participants had not meditated while they were in the scanner. Participants also completed assessments of any symptoms of anxiety and depression before and after the training program.
The Results…
The brain scans of those in the mindful attention group after training showed a decline in activation of the right amygdala in response to all images, which supports the hypothesis that meditation can improve emotional stability and response to stress. In the compassion meditation group, right amygdala activity also fell off in response to positive or neutral images. However, among those who reported practicing compassion meditation most often outside of the training sessions, right amygdala activity showed an increase in response to negative images, all of which depicted some form of human suffering. Researchers reported no significant changes in the control group or in the left amygdala of any of the study's participants. Increased amygdala activation was also correlated with decreased depression scores in the compassion meditation group, which suggests that having more compassion towards others may also be beneficial for oneself. Overall, these results are consistent with the overarching hypothesis that meditation may result in enduring, beneficial changes in brain function, especially in the area of emotional processing.
Blame the Amygdala…
Many studies have shown that criminal psychopaths had decreased connectivity between the amygdala and the prefrontal cortex, which interprets responses from the amygdala. When the connection between these two regions is low, processing of negative stimuli in the amygdala does not translate into any strongly felt negative emotions. This may explain why criminal psychopaths do not feel guilty about their actions, or remorse when their victims suffer. So because the neurons do not connect properly mentally, this means that they have to physically have a guilty body because the physical interaction with their victim is everything to them and this interaction usually results in their victim’s death. After all to have a guilty mind in the context of murder, one must have a capacity for empathy. I have a lot more to write about this but I will have to continue in a part 2…
A Simple Cure…
In the majority of cases, depression is caused by cognitive problems, problems in your thinking that are causing you to see yourself, your life and others in a very negative way. I am not going to start suggesting that you go and start performing Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) on yourself, because my experience with CBT is that it is only useful when practiced with a very skilled CBT Practitioner. So unless you have access to one of these therapists, avoid CBT and CBT self-help books. I do believe though that if you deny your emotions including anger and hate, you will become depressed. Denial is the biggest source of depression. Talk-therapy counts for little and I know of many others who have had the same experience and found that their depression was alleviated by nutrition and nutrition alone. But which comes first? Depression? Or an unhealthy nutrition? I can guarantee you that when a person becomes depressed and they have no respectable self-image that they will do all sorts of harmful things to their bodies and poor nutrition is just one of them. I was severely depressed when my first love broke up with me, I felt that my life was over and my life was no longer worth living. I indulged in a lot of junk food and slept until 2pm every weekend. When we find first love it is as the sky is opening up and beams of light filling our heart. We can live on that high for a while and nothing else matters. Everything around us seems brighter and everyone around us can see our glow. In hindsight this person was there to teach me how to love not to remain there, I had zero self-love and as this was not shown at home I seeked this from him. My depression heightened because I felt that I was unworthy and I truly believed that I was ugly and so I wasted a few years trying to make myself appear “beautiful”. Another factor I believe can contribute to depression is when you have no one to talk to, I believe that for a female, having male figures for example a brother, strong father figure or male role model makes it easier to cope. Ofcourse it sucked at the time but you soon realise that life moves on, the sun still rises and that everything happens for a reason. God only puts you in situations that you can handle and I am grateful to have experienced this as it’s shaped who I have become today and I can truly laugh about it. I will say that listening/watching those who you respect, whether that be a celebrity or a friend can be a good way to get over things. The test of life isn't how few disappointments, losses, or mistakes we endure, rather how we emerge from those events that helps us to cultivate strength and wisdom.
Personally, as a hopeless romantic I have an idea of how it should feel. To be in love with someone is to care about their needs before your own. Whenever you’re around them, it feels as though a warmth as strong as the sun is in your heart. It burns so bright for that person that it almost hurts sometimes. It is truly accepting each other’s flaws and loving those flaws because it’s a part of them. If you've grown up being neglected of care, attention and acceptance, you'll probably have difficulties in showing love, or even to understand what love actually means. That's when you'll have to learn to love yourself to begin with, to appreciate the wonderful being you are born to be. I have the tendency to still panic with my disorganised attachment style, push the person away and sabotage myself but I’ve learnt that it’s importnant not to carry the past into the future. I always follow my heart when making decisions so logic goes out the window, I don’t think this is good advice albeit works for me as my thoughts are aligned with my actions. Am I currently madly in love? Yes. Does the guy know? No LOL. We are due to meet soon so who knows maybe the dopamine can overshadow my shyness and I’ll have the courage to hint it. I told a friend of mine about him and she described me being a watered version of Helga from Hey Arnold. I do have a possessive side, we met at university so maybe there are a few similiaries, although he is not shorter than me LOL. Again I need to do a blog all about love….
The highest frequency that you can emit is love and this is what society doesn’t want you to know. Society wants us to be godless, sexless, genderless, childless, depressed, anxious, afraid, fat, drug addicted, lonely and dependent on the government for everything. Sometimes repetition and expecting a different result isn’t always insanity, sometimes it’s growth, I’m miles behind but I’m still winning because I’m showing up even when other people don’t.
Reprogramming Your Emotions for Health…
You don’t have control over whether your childhood was a happy one. But you do have control over your emotions right now. Doing this requires dealing with your emotions on a deeper energetic level, and actually repairing the damage that’s been done.
There are a number of very effective options out there. The idea is that negative emotions are caused by imbalances in your body's subtle energies (the Chinese call it Qi (pronouced "Chi") if this is properly done, even the heaviest trauma becomes "just something else that happened.” One thing is for certain you want to deal with emotional stress as soon as possible. Letting it linger only gives it more opportunity to cause harm and healing cannot be done on your own. It's impossible to change one's thinking if the brain is not functioning correctly...and again, telling someone whose brain is malfunctioning and already full of self-blame, to change their thinking can easily be the last straw that breaks the camel's back.
Many people experience benefits from prayer, meditation, journaling, breathing exercises, yoga, or sharing their feelings with a close friend, simply pick the methods that feel best for you. Reach out to God. I know this is hard because most likely you don't believe in God after what you've been through. I will say if the trauma started at home then being at home will delay the process because it will remind and trigger the trauma. However, during the rough time I prayed anyway, this was not even consistent and soon enough a way to healing was found when I least expected it. If you can make it to your religious affiliation, please do, the envionment helps tremendously.
I will say don't let anyone sneer at your gentleness as most will whilst transiting. Do you know how hard it is to be weak? You can't imagine the strength it takes to be vulnerable. But it is the only way towards freedom. To take the mask off and be what you are, somebody who always just needs love. We all do. Even the worst of us. And so that is what I am doing. That's what all of this is, I dont want to be cool or clever I will be real and open and serve as an example for those who wish to do the same. If this makes you feel better, all difficulties or troubles are infact a blessing, they are what allows our souls to grow and expand and become greater than before. That is why we are here to suffer and become greater than our previous forms, to become stronger, wiser, more experienced and understanding. The lack of such is considered the greatest curse. I read that if an individual has "absolutely no difficulties or troubles in life" and "All goes perfectly well" then that is an actual sign of a real curse.